The KJR's Survivor Series Preview

It's the one historic PPV that WWE desperately loves to flaunt the history of, but also desperately wants to get rid of. Obligations be damned as I preview each matchup on the PPV card and predict who should and will win each match.

THOUGHTS ON THE MATCH: No one was more supportive of babyface Miz than I was. Even when everyone had turned their back on him, I still supported him as a babyface. But lately my support had been waning. Okay, it was gone. I gave up on babyface Miz too. I admit it. I kept hope, but I lost any real faith in the guy. I think Miz is a talented enough performer to pull off babyface or heel. But in today's WWE if you're not a SUPERFACE, you're barely a babyface. Just ask Kofi Kingston and R-Truth. Miz was about on the same level as the two of them for the past year, which isn't necessarily a bad thing. But since Miz is a former WWE Champion, it seemed worse. The heel turn (if that's what this even is - no one really said it was) is a good thing. Miz was at his best when he was a heel. Personally, I think all superstars are at their best when they are heels. But I'm a self-professed nihilist who whole-heartedly believes that human nature is to be selfish and self-serving, so I may be a bit biased. Put it this way, The Miz would never have made it into the main event of Wrestlemania had he been a babyface. As far as this match is concerned, being as it's derived from one instance in one contest, I don't have much to say about it. It's a kickoff match that means basically nothing.  
WHAT SHOULD HAPPEN: If this is going to be Miz's coming out party as a heel again, then I expect them to really drive that point home. Eye pokes, tight-holding, back rakes and all other heel tactics. If Ric Flair taught him anything, now would be the time to use it.  
WHAT WILL HAPPEN: Again, if this is the statement match that WWE is using to announce Miz as a heel, then he should win easily. Kofi Kingston needs no protection from WWE, so it'd be just fine if Miz defeats him soundly. But given this is a kickoff match, I wouldn't be surprised if the babyface won. Miz didn't exactly tally up wins as a babyface and those W's are going to be few and far between as a heel now. Miz should pick up a win in this match, but don't expect many more to follow.

THOUGHTS ON THE MATCH: I was hoping that the rivalry between AJ Lee and Natalya was going to be rekindled after Natalya made AJ tap-out with the Sharpshooter a few weeks back. I should have known that WWE wasn't going to allow this perfect opportunity to whore out Total Divas to just pass by. A 7-on-7 match? There's 7 Total Divas cast members. Quelle surprise! They wanted this match so bad that they didn't even worry about the gaping plotholes on the opposing team. Let's start with the obvious one. Kaitlyn's not a heel. Doesn't matter, as it's not really a heel vs face match. I mean, on RAW this past week, AJ was technically playing the part of the babyface against Vickie Guerrero. Then on Smackdown, heel GM Vickie utilized babyface Funkadactyls to exact revenge on AJ. Where the hell is Layla? Then there's also the forgotten point where even the non-Total Divas divas turned on AJ Lee and Tamina Snuka was her only friend. Now, they're teaming up again with absolutely no explanation. And finally, there's the whole thing with The Bella Twins and Eva Marie supposedly at odds on Total Divas. Yet, everytime Eva Marie teams with the other Total Divas, she totally enters alongside the Bellas. It's all convoluted. And the parts that aren't convoluted are stupid. Welcome to the WWE Divas Division. Please, can we have Paige now?  
WHAT SHOULD HAPPEN: Both teams only have one real wrestler on the roster and if there's any justice the herd will be thinned early and often, leaving only them to do the real wrestling. I'm speaking of AJ Lee and Natalya, in case you were wondering. But an honorable mention goes out to Naomi. I don't know what to expect until we get down to the final 2 or 3 divas. Utter chaos, perhaps? Maybe a facepalm or two. Definitely some LOL-able moments.  
WHAT WILL HAPPEN: WWE are not going to miss out on the chance to put their vaunted reality TV show on the main stage, which is why the Total Divas team will win. Thankfully WWE seems intent on leaving that Divas Title on AJ Lee for the moment, which is the correct move. A loss in a non-title, multi-opponent match like this won't hurt her as Divas Champ. Everyone knows she's better than this.

THOUGHTS ON THE MATCH: Big E Langston as Intercontinental Champion gives that title a lot of exposure. The Intercontinental Championship on Big E Langston's waist gives him a lot of exposure. It's a match made in BIG MAN heaven. When Vince McMahon dies, he goes there and gets 72 of them. All jokes aside, I really do LIKE Langston. And having him as Intercontinental Champion is the best thing to happen to that title since Cody Rhodes held it and brought back the iconic white belt. I don't believe that suddenly WWE will value the IC Title anymore than they have due to it being on Langston's waist. But Langston is a BIG man that can't be ignored. He has the power Vince loves. He has the ability and agility that makes him multi-dimensional. And he's African-American, which is a demographic WWE sorely needs to pander to. I HATE that this has to come on the heels of Curtis Axel being such a disappointment. It doesn't bode well for him or his future. He's fought a long time to get to the main roster and this is the second time he's striking out. At 34 years old, Joe Hennig doesn't have much time before WWE gives up on him. A lot of his fans who were on the bandwagon when he debuted as Curtis Axel has gotten off on this last stop. I haven't yet, but I'd be lying if I said I'm wasn't tempted.  
WHAT SHOULD HAPPEN: This rematch won't be much different than the inital match on RAW this past week. This match is mostly filler. Okay, it's all filler. But the same could probably be said for every match on the card except for the WWE Championship.  
WHAT WILL HAPPEN: Big E Langston is a lock to retain the Intercontinental Championship. There's no reason why he should or would drop the title only days after losing it. The fans will be solidly behind Langston, which is somewhat confounding as he has zero charisma - which was the big knock on Curtis Axel. Maybe it's the physique after all.

THOUGHTS ON THE MATCH: I take umbrage with them calling this a 'traditional' Survivor Series match. The real Traditional Survivor Series matches were 7-on-7. It's sad when the Divas match is more legitimate than the superstars'. I'm glad The Shield is in the match. They do very well in multi-superstar tag team matches. I was hoping they'd be paired with the Wyatt Family, but that hope has gone. The Real Americans aren't a bad consolation. They might be my favorite tag team in WWE right now. Having them in a high-profile match alongside The Shield should do wonders for raising their stock in WWE's Tag Team Division. It also doesn't hurt that they had a pretty damn good Tag Team Title match on Smackdown, even though they lost. Speaking of the Tag Team Champions, they have been absolutely amazing since their return. I've mostly been impressed with Goldust. Who knew Dustin Runnels had it, never mind still having it. As Goldust in the early '90's, he was more style than substance. I never thought of him as being a championship worthy competitor. But at the young age of 44, he's putting on some of the best matches of his career. Cody Rhodes ain't bad himself, but we already knew what he was capable of. Their partners are a bit of a headscratcher though. The Usos, who only recently faced Rhodes & Goldust for the Tag Team Titles and claimed they actually want another shot at the gold, aren't in a position to backup that claim. Not unless this is some ploy to leave the champs high-n-dry. But I don't expect that. WWE has no plans to turn The Usos into heels. Not as long as one of them - I don't know which - is involved with Total Divas. And the mystery partner, the returning Rey Mysterio, is rumored to not even be ready to return. It's just a rumor and he seemed fine on Smackdown, albeit he didn't take much offense in the tag match and was only in action for about 3 minutes. I'm happy to see him back, but it's bad timing for him as WWE is back on their BIG MAN kick and he's the antithesis to that. His time as a top-level superstar is over anyway and he'll live out the rest of his WWE career as a sideshow. This is pretty much a makeshift match that was made under duress and obligation. The one thing that WWE hates to do is create the gimmick match for their own gimmick PPV.  
WHAT SHOULD HAPPEN: There are no titles on the line here. But with WWE's new rule that if you pin a champion in any type of match whatsoever, you automatically become the number one contender, this sort of becomes a #1 Contender's match for the Tag Team Championship that The Usos can't win. Poor them. If any member of The Shield pins either Cody Rhodes or Goldust, they get a Tag Team Title shot. Ditto for The Real Americans. Perhaps if the babyface team wins, The Usos could get a title shot. Nah.  
WHAT WILL HAPPEN: WWE seems pretty adamant about making the tag team division stronger than it already is, and it's pretty damn strong right now. The best thing they can do is build up the Tag Team Champions, which they have been doing a great job of, and build up the contenders for those titles, which has also been very well done. The Real Americans and The Shield have gotten their title shot and lost. There's not much reason to open that door again so soon, not when there are other tag teams vying in the background. Mysterio, The Usos, Rhodes & Goldust win the match only because I don't think WWE is planning settling on another #1 Contender so soon. They don't want another forgotten title shot on the books. Again, poor Usos.

THOUGHTS ON THE MATCH: Daniel Bryan has some nerve calling himself 'The Beard' when he's going to be across the ring from these two fantastical freaks of facial fuzz. His beard even pales in comparison to that of Bray Wyatt. WWE has some nerve blaming Daniel Bryan for the lack of PPV buys over the past few months. He wasn't the only superstar involved in those matches or in the rivalry. And three of the four superstars are still involved in the main event for this PPV. Basically, it's Daniel Bryan who has to walk away with his dick in his hands, and he's still never have held the WWE Championship for more than a day. Bullshit. Now he and CM Punk, who is also receiving the butt-end of WWE's renewed BIG MAN fetish, get to team up and face - who would've guessed - two BIG MEN that WWE desperately wants to push. All of that is negative, I know. Yet for some reason, I LIKE this match. Maybe it's due to the boner I get seeing Punk and Bryan in the ring together. Maybe it's because I really LIKE Bray Wyatt. Maybe it's due to the fact that even though WWE is trying their best to hold down both Punk and Bryan, they are still the most popular superstars in WWE. They still get the loudest pops every night, they still have the most fan support. This match still has the most buzz around it of any other match on the card. And despite what WWE would like to believe, it's not because of Erick Rowan and Luke Harper, it's because of CM Punk and Daniel Bryan.  
WHAT SHOULD HAPPEN: Luke Harper and Erick Rowan are beasts. No doubt. They are also rookies. And in this match, they are facing two - count 'em, two - former WWE Champions in this match. No matter how strongly WWE wants to push these monstrosities, the former WWE Champions are the better team and should win this match with ease.  
WHAT WILL HAPPEN: You can't discount Bray Wyatt in this match. He's not exactly cleared to wrestle yet, but he's able to play a big part in any given match. He's shown that he can at least hit his finisher, if nothing else. That may be all that's necessary for him to sway the match in favor of Harper & Rowan. But because they are facing two former WWE Champions and the two best wrestlers in the company, who can more than hold their own in any contest put in front of them, I doubt it's going to be as easy as to defeat them as the numbers game. Daniel Bryan and CM Punk win what should be the best match of the night.

THOUGHTS ON THE MATCH: Had I known that Survivor Series was going to be in Cena's quasi-hometown of Boston, Mass., I'd definitely have picked him to win the World Title at the previous PPV. WWE is going to do everything in their power to keep Cena on top of the company, no matter who gets harmed in the process. Cena isn't even a candidate to fall victim to the 'hometown curse' in WWE. He's perhaps the only superstar that it doesn't apply to. Let's all just be honest for a second. This match is not a draw. Alberto Del Rio is no threat to defeat John Cena. With Cena coming off of an elbow injury and Del Rio possessing the most poignant submission in WWE for capitalizing on elbow injuries, he couldn't defeat John Cena. Now with a month to have further healed and with Cena having wrestled with the injury on multiple occassions, why are we supposed to believe that Del Rio has a snowball's chance in hell of defeating him now? That's to say nothing of the obvious heel vs SUPERFACE comparison that is heavily one-sided and the fact that Cena just won the World Heavyweight Championship. Cena is in no jeopardy of losing that title anytime soon and definitely not right now. Especially not to Del Rio.  
WHAT SHOULD HAPPEN: The good news is that these two superstars know each other very well. They've had many, many matches against each other and they should have no problem delivering a decent, competitive match.  
WHAT WILL HAPPEN: The bad news is that no matter how well they know each other, no matter how competitive this match is, it has only one ending. It's with John Cena retaining the World Title.

THOUGHTS ON THE MATCH: Anyone else questioning why Big Show is accepting one WWE Title match in lieu of the 'millions' of dollars he was set to receive in the lawsuit? Yes it's all fake, but even in my wildest daydreams of winning the lottery, I know better than to take the sucker's deal. You take the money. You always take the money. Besides, it's not like Big Show would never eventually get another title shot. At this time last year he was the reigning World Heavyweight Champion. Plus, he turns both heel and babyface at least once a year. Once he aligns with the right person or persons, he'd get another title shot. Personally, I HATE this entire rivalry. It was fine when it was in the background of the Daniel Bryan vs Randy Orton rivalry, but once Daniel Bryan got shooed off in favor of the BIG MAN, I soured on it fairly quickly. It didn't help seeing Big Show get winded from only walking to and from the ring twice. That doesn't inspire me into thinking this will be any kind of competitive contest. And the cherry on top is the announcement that The Authority will force Randy Orton to face Big Show without any help. That means there will be no interference from The Shield or Kane or Triple H or anyone. First of all, that's not what this match needs. In fact, it's the opposite of what this match needs. And second, I don't believe that'll happen for a second. Since when are we supposed to trust the word of heel bosses?  
WHAT SHOULD HAPPEN: Thankfully, I fully expect for not just one member of The Authority to interfere in this match, but all of them. It took every single one of them to take Big Show out and put him through a table on RAW. It's most likely going to take the same force at the PPV as well. And that's what should happen. That's how you build the formerly crying, slobbering Big Show back up into the menacing GIANT they claim he's supposed to be. He can't walk away from the match as the winner, but he can re-solidify his BIG MAN status by taking everything The Authority can throw at him and getting back up.  
WHAT WILL HAPPEN: I don't expect them to take the title off of Randy Orton so soon after winning it... again. I expect Randy Orton to win the match and retain the WWE Title thanks to the overwhelming power of The Authority.